We don’t receive wisdom. Wisdom must be discovered. With wisdom comes enlightenment and with enlightenment comes peace and joy. The famous scripture “man is that he might have joy” should be rephrased to say that “man is that he might be worthy of joy”. We come into joy through use of agency and the experience that comes through choice.
Because we are spirits having a human experience, life as we know it is a spiritual journey. But there are times when the experience of life hits you like a spiritual orgasm and you are left feeling a deep connection to your Heavenly home. A true spiritual journey is to go in search of purpose and meaning. But most times a spiritual journey is not a planned adventure. The beginning of the journey can come through a phone call, a message, a letter, a dream, or just “the last straw”. My most recent spiritual journey has a twofold beginning.
I used to think that a formal education was unnecessary. As a young girl out of high school I didn’t see the need for higher learning and choose a different path. Thirty years and six children later I enrolled in college. At first it wasn’t something I wanted to do. I entered because my employer requires the status of a Bachelor’s Degree in order to hire me as a full time employee.
My first semester of school followed the summer of Ammon’s accident. Tuesday July 26, 2011 late in the evening I received the phone call a mother should never receive. The familiar sound of the ringtone that tells me Ammon is calling broke the silence. Without even looking at the phone I answered and said, “Hello Ammon.” A foreign voice spoke into my ear, “This is not Ammon this is Matt. I’m here in Flagstaff with your son. He was in an accident.”
Ammon’s accident combined with my formal education has taken me on an unplanned spiritual journey.
One of the first classes I took was Philosophy. I had heard and been warned many times that taking a philosophy class could destroy my testimony and belief in God. I challenged the rumors and jumped in.
The first assignment was to read Schopenhauer’s On Thinking for Oneself. I learned the contrast between nurture and nature. To be nurtured is to learn through experience. As a parent I must teach my children the truths they need to know for their future success. Schopenhauer said that, “A man cannot turn over anything in his mind unless he knows it; he should, therefore, learn something. Thinking must be kindled…it must be sustained by some interest in the matter at hand.”
We exist therefore we think, but we must study and learn in order to make the most of our thoughts. Schopenhauer promotes thinking for oneself but also explains that nurture and nature work together. He says, “Thinkers and men of genius are those who have gone straight to the book of Nature; it is they who have enlightened the world and carried humanity further on its way. If a man’s thoughts are to have truth and life in them, they must, after all, be his own fundamental thoughts; for these are the only ones that he can fully and wholly understand.
That was my introduction to Philosophy by Doctor Hyrum LaTurner and in this first lesson I was reminded that I have the right to think for myself and therefore can question the philosophies that I would learn in this class.
As time went on we are introduced to many philosophers and then we were introduced to the philosophy of Nietzsche which was that “Science killed God”. As science has evolved God has become obsolete.
There were many occasions in class where I would connect with “nature” through prayer and instantly ask, “is this philosophy true and if not then guide me to what is truth so that I can embrace my own fundamental thoughts.” The study of science killing God was one of those spiritual orgasms that forced me to embrace truth and connect with Heaven.
As Professor LaTurner taught I thought about my personal experience.
When I was told that Ammon was near death and would be going into surgery without a family member or friend anywhere present I said to Matt, “We are LDS. Is there someone in the hospital that can give him a Priesthood blessing?” Peaceful words of comfort filled my being when Matt said to me that he was LDS and could perform the blessing and the helicopter pilot would be able to assist. I spent the next five hours and infact the next six weeks in prayer. I prayed to God that He would send angels to guide the hand of the Doctors so that Ammon could be healed.
The philosophy of Nietzsche was that science had replaced God but in my own fundamental thoughts that I learned through personal experience, it was clear that God and science work together. One cannot exist without the other. The universe in which we exist could not magically appear through a “Big Bang”. God needed science to create the universe and all of the elements of science needed a creator to organize the matter.
Clearly Nietzsche was mistaken and most probably recognizes that in his post mortal existence.
That was the beginning of an ongoing spiritual journey. I continue with the pursuit of my formal education and each day I feel the presence of angels guiding the process of fundamental thought. Day after day I see the value of this thing called education and recognize that everything I learn I get to keep.
This educational journey is challenging in every way possible and in this challenge I am finding my greatest joy.
